Wow - I’m now at 22 weeks with 18 more to go. That’s so cool, my number of “to go” week is FOUR less than the number of weeks pregnant I am! I’ve been so un-anxious this whole time. Then I hit 20-21 weeks and I could feel baby more and I felt like we reached the point of “countdown” vs. counting up and I so can’t wait to meet this baby. I’ve had so many labor/birth dreams and all have been soooo great; so peaceful; so beautiful.
This whole pregnancy is becoming more and more real every day. My tummy is growing. I’ve put on a bunch of “tissue stores” just within the last few weeks. My stomach felt “heavy” for the first time a few days ago. Because of my growing tummy, this pregnancy and new baby is becoming more and more real for my other kids. Because of my growing tummy, others in the family have been asking us a lot more questions in the last few weeks. These are family members that we didn’t really tell, but that we’ve seen at family gatherings. Now it’s obvious I’m expecting again and so they ask questions about baby. Then there’s my husband - he’s feeling more and more movement. He’s making more comments about my growing belly, asking me if I’m okay, talking a little about things that go through his mind about the new baby,etc - so it’s all just really starting to “hit home” even more than before.
Another thing I find contradictory is that this whole time I kept wondering when I’d start feeling uncomfortable. When will I start feeling a bit more “clumsy” or less “mobile?” When will I get more aches and pains? When will I stop being able to crack my back by twisting, etc, etc, etc. Well, again, all these things seemed to happen all at once in the past few weeks. Now that they’ve happened, I find myself wondering, if I feel this uncomfortable now and I’m only “half way,” what am I going to feel like in a month or two or three when baby REALLY grows and gets bigger? If I’ve already gained more “tissue stores” than I care to in my upper thighs and hips, how much more will I put on over the course of the next 4 months? If my maternity shorts are already feeling tight, how much longer will I be able to wear them and how much bigger a size am I going to need to carry me through the rest of the pregnancy?
I think of these things and remember that I can’t complain. I am so happy and thankful to be pregnant right now that I really can’t grumble. If I don’t like the amount of “tissue stores” I’m gaining, then I just need to eat less junks and exercise more regularly. If I do that, I won’t have a problem with what I gain because it’ll probably be “necessary.” Then when I have aches and pains, I also know that part of it is because I’m not keeping my muscles in shape to carry the extra weight. I know I can do a better job of keeping off unnecessary fat and also minimizing aches by staying as fit as I can with regular exercise. So - I’m working on it. Okay…that’s really enough for now. I’ll be back another day with more thoughts. 